London: Getting Around

I can't help but be enamored with the charm of England. Once I'm here, I love London. It's GETTING here that's the pits.

I have the currency of four countries in my wallet: U.S. dollars, British pounds, Thai baht, and the currency of the country in which I live Somewhere in Asia.

Within twelve hours, I flew from Bangkok to London, and I can't help but notice the difference between these vastly different cities. Heathrow Airport is, by  far, the worst airport I've ever passed through.

Take customs. After an overnight, twelve hour, red-eye flight, there's nothing worse for this traveler than a menagerie of grumpy customs guys. The people whose job it is to help people through the lines have about as much personality as wet worms. They don't say please, and the kindest remark I got was "You. Move over here."  To hold up the line, an old, bitter official with beady eyes says, "Stop. Stay behind the line." He holds up his hand as if I had made a criminal offense, or at least as though I were about to cross the street while a "Don't Walk" sign is blinking. I feel like a little school girl being chastised by the traffic cop. They're grumpy, those line guys at customs; they are, beyond a doubt, workers hanging on for their pensions. They hate their jobs more than they hate me. I had just gotten off a plane where elegant Thai ladies in purple present me with orchids and who look as though they are genuinely sad to see me leave the plane. After the smiles and warm service in Thailand, who would want to come to the UK?

Then there's the Heathrow airport itself. It's small. Crowded. The signs are difficult to read, and the ceilings are low. Aesthetically, it's an ugly, poorly lit place to spend even a minute of traveling time. Confused tourists stand around in clusters, blocking pedestrian traffic. And what's the deal with one of the terminals being miles away? Why can't we use luggage trolleys on the train? There's so much congestion in this airport that it's actually a relief to leave and get out to the busy streets.

Bangkok International Airport, on the other hand, is a breeze. There's space to breathe. Open walkways. Friendly smiles. Warmth. BIA is an airport you don't want to leave. You can have a Thai foot or shoulder massage while you wait. You can slurp fruit smoothies and order excellent vegetarian food. Signs are clear. Plus, the sky train in Thailand is fast, efficient, and easy-to-use for even the most inexperienced of travelers. It's easy to buy a sky train card, and maps are readily available. |I have never had to ask an official in Thailand for help on how to use the sky train, and this traveler doesn't even speak Thai!

It's quite a different story when using the Underground in London. Unless you're a Londonite who uses the underground regularly, the entire process of getting to the underground and paying for the ticket is confusing, even for native English speakers. I had to ask three different (equally grumpy!) officials how to get change for the ticket machine. They acted as though I were a great bother to them, and another woman and I looked at each other and rolled our eyes after the third guy failed to help us, Eventually, we figured it out ourselves. Then, there are lines for tickets. Long lines. And, when I got off at my station, there was a ten minute wait for the elevator to go up to the street! Eee, gads! The London folks have got to get their act together if they're interested in welcoming tourists, or in having them return. If the process was this difficult for an experienced world traveler like me, imagine what it must be like for first-time travelers!

Despite my gripes, I'm finally here. And despite the transportation issues that this country has, and the horrible currency exchange rate, I love London. I'm staying at a hotel with a fantastic garden with lavender and petunias and vines and green, green grass. I can buy a pint of Guinness with my Caesar salad. The furniture in my room is made of varnished mahogany, and the fixtures are brass. There's a feeling of "Old Europe" here in Central London that is just so very romantic to this American gal. With its parks, slates sidewalks, window boxes, brownstones, and traditional, European architecture, I can't help but be enamored with the charm of England. Once I'm here, I love this city. It's GETTING  here that's the pits!

Today I'm off to see the sights. The Guardian is outside my hotel room door with news of Prince William graduating, Wimbledon, and the Glastonbury Festival. Covent Gardens is calling me, and the spirit of all things British is quickening this traveler's blood.

Comments

[Expat Nomad]

I'm with ya sista! Sometimes I think that getting into the UK feels like trying to get into (or out of) the US! I understand that they have a job to do and it isn't a very glam thing, but at least have some pride that you have a job and it pays well. Geesh!

As far as being here in the UK, it is nice to be in an English-speaking land. I am still in the process of learning to NOT feel guilty when I speak English here and I still feel a little hesitant as I sound like a foreigner. Oh well, I'm sure when you get here, that will all go away!

Enjoy the sights of London, buy that cool stuff you've been eyeing up, and I'll see ya here soon. By the way, the forecast is for sunny skies and temps in the low 20s - perfect for a ride...

[Frida K]

Hey Honey!

Stalag Luft Heathrow ain't so bad, you just got to know where to find the smoked salmon and champagne counter - chat them up long long enough and you'll get handfulls of chocolate to lift your spirits. As to the guys just smile that'll confuse 'em, smiling at customs officials and passport control people is a bit of a sport with me. Russian customs were the most fun a girl could have with her clothes on!

Glad you've arrived safely in the land of my birth. Miss dirty grimy London with its pigeons and grey skies in the winter and that party feeling with people
spilling out of pubs onto the streets and sunlight filtering through the trees in the summer.Wish I was drinking scrumpy with you in Soho... nostalgia... argh!

Frida

[Musings on the Run]

Ackkkk don't remind me of the Heathrow thing. Hours of delay, ugly ugly carpeting, and VERY annoying officials.

I am now at Shannon airport, Ireland; and I'm headed home through... you guessed it. Rats.

And honestly; there is no Guiness like the Guiness in Ireland.

It would be surreal to meet at an airport sometime; who knows? stranger things have happened ;)

[shamash]

Hey, Frida K! I thought of you today since there's an exhibition here in London on Frida Kahlo's work. Good to hear from you. And you're absolutely right about smiling. I've been doing a lot of that today, and ya know what? It works! I'll have to try to find that salmon counter on my way back through Heathrow.

Musings on the Run: I'll have to try a Guiness in Ireland next year... you're not the first to tell me that Irish Guiness is better. And oh: use Frida's advice and try to find that salmon counter. Perhaps it will balance out the gray (I mean grey) carpeting and dismal atmosphere!

[Amelia]

Aah yes, you know you're back in the UK when you've had at least 3 people be insufferably rude to you. Last time I went back I had the rare and unnerving experience of a bus driver being a) helpful and b) friendly. I spent at least 5 minutes staring nervously out of the bus window checking for signs that said 'London' as I wasn't sure I'd actually arrived.
On the plus side, go saunter down the South Bank for me, and raise a toast to the Globe, the Tate Modern and the Gherkin for me. She's a bit of a creaky old lady of a city, but she does have her own special glamour.

[US conception/born sicilian]

this is only my experience but:I lived in England for seven months and I was moving here and there all the times, but one thing that struck me was that I NEVER EVER had to carry my suitcases around (in the streets or in the underground etc.) because some men would ALWAYS offer to do it for me! Before that I was in Japan and it NEVER EVER happened that a man helped me...
I wish I was there with you....can you imagine how much fun?

[shamash]

You are so right, Ms. Sicily. Chivalry here in the UK is the best. However, in order to work for Transport for London, all chivalry must be repressed. One man actually said, "We're not allowed to help people with luggage." (sort of like airport officials in the US)

Outside of the transport system, I must say, everyone has been most helpful. Once, I needed an aspirin, and the hotel employee went out to his car and got one for me... and the people on the trains/Heathrow Express were most helpful with my luggage!

As for YOU getting help carrying your things: who WOULDN'T carry luggage for Ms. Sicily? ;-)