"Walk around feeling like a leaf. Know you could tumble any second. Then decide what to do with your time."
-NAOMI SHIHAB NYE
-original photo by shamash
Fall 2004 "Remembrance Day"
Notes on Disappearing: How to spend my time?
I wish I could be five people:
- the socialite, out at all the functions
- the jock, working out every day
- the spiritual seeker, meditating and hanging out at the Kali temple, the Chinese temple, and the golden pagodas here in this city somewhere in Asia,
- the decent teacher / student, ready with kick-ass lesson plans, correcting those essays, and writing her master's thesis and
- the writer, who's writing every day, cranking out those short stories, showing up at the page
But, I'm not five people.
And finding the time to balance all that I would like to do is next to impossible.
When do I find time to write? With one of my first pieces of non-fiction to be published in a book coming out in a few weeks (horray!, but I hate the cover), I could kick myself for not making writing my priority. I'm too busy sculling, correcting papers, writing my thesis, organizing my desk drawers, paying the bills, and yes: blogging!!!
Tomorrow I have a deadline. And I'm not going to meet it.
I'm such a schmuck. So, I'm going to do two things:
- I'm going to re-read the THE SEVEN HABITS OF HIGHLY EFFECTIVE AUTHORS. (Thanks, Lynn, for the link!)
- I'm going into hermit phase. I've done it before.
This beautiful poem by Naomi Shihab Nye will be my mantra:
When they say Don't I know you? say no.
When they invite you to the party
remember what parties are like
Someone telling you in a loud voice
they once wrote a poem. Greasy sausage balls on a paper plate.
If they say we should get together.
say why? It's not that you don't love them any more.
You're trying to remember something
too important to forget.
The monastery bell at twilight.
Tell them you have a new project.
It will never be finished. When someone recognizes you in a grocery store
nod briefly and become a cabbage.
When someone you haven't seen in ten years
appears at the door,
don't start singing him all your new songs.
You will never catch up.
Walk around feeling like a leaf. Know you could tumble any second.
Then decide what to do with your time.